I am at a loss to feel anything for anyone right now.

It has been pretty much stomped out of me. Compassion, empathy, caring…you name it. I see nothing but the darkness that envelops your soul and has laid claim to my heart.

It’s not a new feeling for me – I’ve been here before.

It takes a little more life out of me each time – especially when its the constant, incessant and on-going dialog going on in my head.

I’m broken.

Much the same as last night, it looks as if I’ll be drinking again tonight. I’m so tired of it all – life, pain, the deterioration of the world we inhabit, the repeated demonstrations of the lack of intelligence in the world…I feel as if there is nothing left to do.

Nothing to say…

Nowhere to go…

Nothing to look forward to…

Is THIS all there is?

Why am I here?

I’m old and I’m angry.

There is so much I NEED to do…I feel that I’m BEHIND on everything…I feel like I am failing at life in general…but I am so physically exhausted that I can barely move. I am not excited about life and what it holds in store for me.