Friday.

End of the work week. The last dash to the finish line for a much-needed and well-deserved 3-day weekend. Working from home during this pandemic, I am finding it hard to divide work time from relaxing weekend time.

I don’t know what it is. This is a whole new world for everyone. It has shined the harsh light of reality on many more aspects of our lives than we’d like.

=> At a time where we need to be together, we can’t. At a time we need a leader, we don’t have one.

=> At a time when we need the operative word to be “UNITED” in the name of our country, it isn’t.

=> At a time where we need intelligent thought from our fellow citizens, we get blatant, ignorant stupidity.

=> At a time when we sorely need humanity, the demonstration of that trait is the exception, rather than the rule.

I am feeling in that dark place again. It’s taking all I have not to jump out of my skin and scream at the top of my lungs in anger and frustration. My mind won’t stop with the incessant chatter of my heart arguing with the demons from the darkness. I find myself losing the ability to give a fuck about anything. My body seems to fight me with its constant pain and stiffness. What did I do to deserve this? How am I supposed to cope with all of this?

Nothing will ever be the same again. A lot of people can’t deal with that. Especially the fat, lazy and stupid Republican conservatives. Let me say it again –

NOTHING. WILL. EVER. BE. THE. SAME. AGAIN.

The planet is fighting back. This is an extinction event. A thinning of the heard. A purging of souls that didn’t have to happen to this degree. We have the knowledge to address this issue. But, thanks to the conservative idiots and robber-barons, we weren’t allowed to intelligently use it. Instead, we created another lethal plague on the land – fat, lazy and ignorant stooges following a racist, narcissist demagogue. Nothing more dangerous than groups of idiots in large numbers.

Is that what’s sucking the life out of me? Dealing with these morons? To be honest, I find myself hoping that these bazooka-toting half-wits who (in the name of constitutional freedom) want to stop wearing masks and get back to their bowling alleys, hair salons and health clubs now will all catch the virus and we’ll not have to deal with their like again. And if any of them who are so butt-hurt about wearing a face mask into the grocery store and cause anyone else’s beloved family member to pass away from catching it be charged with murder.

I have to let go. Nelson Mandela said that carrying anger in your heart is like drinking poison and expecting your enemy to die.

It’s not an easy task, believe me.